Me, with my 1970s Ethan Allen canopy bed
Should Kids Have Their Own Bedrooms?
Oh yeah. I’m going there.
“The boys must be so excited to get their own rooms!” That is the most common thing I hear when I tell people we are remodeling our house. (In case you are one of the few that I haven’t told yet… we’re adding on a bedroom and bathroom. And gutting the kitchen!)
Since our second son was born, the boys have slept in the same room. First, with a crib and a twin bed, then with two bunk beds broken apart, and most recently with the beds stacked. We read books to both of them before bed, said our bedtime prayers together and tucked them both in. When the bedroom door closes to just a crack, the chatter begins. I love the listening to the chatter.
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But since the construction began, our whole family has been staying with my mother in the four-bedroom suburban home where I grew up. My parents were immigrants and our house reflected the aspirations of the American Dream. Forget a chicken in every pot. In 1970s suburbia, the dream was to have a bedroom for every kid.
My childhood room is still decked out with yellow canopy bed; next door, my brother’s is furnished with a brown Ethan Allen set. Little Brother chose the yellow bed; Big Brother took the brown version. It was a novelty for them to have their own spaces — something we’ve tried to remind them is a temporary thing. What’s the harm in letting them experience a little independence?
Click on over to Mom.me to read the rest of Do Kids Really Need Their Own Bedrooms?…
There needs to be some perspective on this. In big families like ours 6 children, sometimes a child having their own bedroom can be helpful at different stages in life. We were poor, so at least 2 sisters had to share 1 bedroom at any given time.
I was the eldest and for whatever reason my parents gave me my own bedroom. Then later in renting a place, I shared a bedroom with a sister which I had to get used to..but no biggie. So a child experiencing both is useful.
I think more importantly if there is a place in house for teenager to spend hrs. of private time… I did a lot of art and poetry, so I really needed to zone out on my own,
Thanks for sharing your perspective, Jean. That reminds me that my parents both grew up very similarly to the way you describe, with many siblings sharing the same room. I think they really wanted my brother and I not to experience the inconveniences of that, which is partly why they were so adamant about kids having their own bedrooms.
As always, your comments are so insightful!